Here's a little extra I do when I am performing weddings for blended families:

I have the "new" parent make this speech to the "new" kids as part of the ceremony or perhaps before:  "I know I won't ever be your "mom" or "dad" because you already have one, but I do have a special gift for you.  I'm going to love your (dad/mom) better than he/she has ever been loved before.  Together we are going to show you what a husband/wife and parents are supposed to be.  If you watch us, you will see what a family should be.   Although I won't be your (mom/dad) I will be your very good friend, if you will let me."

We have found that this works really well...especially when the promises are lived out.

Don R. "Dick" Ivey PhD, Author of "My Marriage was Lousy & My Divorce Ain't So Hot" and "Boiling the Frog--Crises in the American First Family."  Dick & his wife Barbara coach marriages and train churches to equip mentoring couples.

"Shirley Cress Dudley has nailed this hot topic with her book, 'Blended Family Advice.'  In a world where all it takes to be married is to have enough birthdays to make a decision without parental consent, find someone who will have you, and be able to afford the price of a license, it's no wonder that so many marriages fail. Shirley Cress Dudley has taken her first hand experience and honed some real-world advice that all blended families should read and heed."

Don R. "Dick" Ivey PhD, Author of "My Marriage was Lousy & My Divorce Ain't So Hot" and "Boiling the Frog--Crises in the American First Family."